Tuesday, January 19, 2010

A New Year, A New Me

I'm back! I've been back at work since January 4th, 2010, but have been super busy cleaning up, catching up and the like. I really really missed working. That may sound a little crazy to some, but I really did. I love my job. I love my doctors. I love my patients.

I do have a brand spanking new neck, but alas I think they gave me a partially used model ;) The surgery itself was not that bad. The pain was horrible. The philly collar was a nightmare. I go for my post op check {finally} on Jan 21st. I still find my left arm to be affected. At times my neck will tense up and stretch my head to rest on my left shoulder. I do not even know when this is happening. I will have Guy come up to me and tell me to straighten my head; or even better, he will adjust it for me! But when this happens [and moreso throughout the day}, my left arm will be rendered useless. It will flex to a position that is along my body, bending along the front and my hand will be "locked" in an upwards position. Very hard to explain, but it bothers me.

I do find my headaches have drastically lessened which is HUGE for me!! Gone are my times hanging out in a blacked-out bathroom, sitting on the floor with my head between my legs!! woo hoo!!

The boys are doing really well. Liam told me Sunday night that he wants to go work for Safeway {grocery store} when he is 16, until he is 18. Then he will still live with me, but will help us with bills!! OMG my sweet boy is the greatest! Then he decided that Guy makes really good money so he will work with him when he is 18!! Money money money, Liam has always been about the money--right from toddlerhood; making his precious Poppa Tom get out of his favorite couch so he could ransack under the cushions looking for what fell out of Poppa's pockets! Not to mention how he'd literally go through Poppa's pockets because that money was going fall out anyways!!!

Mikey is Mikey. He absolutely is in love with music. He really always has been, but lately he has taken a big interest in instruments. Guy and Pierre are very good at acoustic guitars and Mikey will sit between them just watching {and sneak in a few strums while they are not watching1}. Well Guy bought a mini AG for the boys and Mikey tried. He tried just as he always tries at everything. Guy tells me that it will be impossible for him to play. I don't believe it, but logically I think I know that it will be hard. Mikey's PT said it will be difficult. I don't want to believe that. I went my whole pregnancy & even his first few months of life thinking so many things he wouldn't be able to do--or everything will be difficult. But then he proved me and everyone else wrong. Mikey has been able to do everything and anything. He would always find a way & then I became his biggest fan and supporter.

I feel like if I think he won't be able to play guitar, then I am letting him down as a mom. I have never let him use his hands as an excuse, he's never needed that. What would that make me, if I "give up" on him? I hate feeling like this. I never wanted to use his hands as an excuse, but then I am starting to think that I am lying to myself and to him. ..